What a phrase: “I
am languishing.” What a confession! Basically the psalmist is saying, “All my
strength is gone. I’m withering. I’m shriveling up. I am dying.”
Why?
He fears God’s anger.
He dreads God’s discipline given in wrath. His alarm is so great that he feels it in his
bones. His sorrow is so deep he feels it
physically.
Perhaps we can relate.
It’s that feeling we get when we’ve truly let down one we love. It’s that sensation of knowing your spouse’s
sorrow is because of what you did. It’s
the shame of returning to a sin that had broken you before. It’s being at the bottom of the pit with no
way to climb out.
What do you do when you get in that place of
brokenness? What do you do when you are
languishing? Have stiff drink? Suck it up?
Put a brave face on and stuff the pain down deep where no one can
see? Do you walk around wounded and
torn, wishing things could be better?
None of these things will solve your pain.
The psalmist cries out, “Heal me, O Lord.”
Heal me.
Confessing sin is to acknowledge more than just a flaw or
a crack in our integrity. It is to
recognize that we are utterly ruined. We
are beyond what we can do for ourselves.
We need to be healed. We need
someone to come from the outside and rescue us.
So Jesus came healing the sick as a sign of His divinity
and His authority – authority to heal us of our sins. Surely he has borne our infirmities. He carried our sin upon His shoulders and by
His stripes – the punishment He received for our sin – we are healed.
“The LORD has heard
my plea; the LORD accepts my prayer.” God has given us the remedy for our sin, our
guilt, our deepest pain that leaves us a weeping mess. He has given us the blood of Jesus to cleanse
us from all unrighteousness. We are
cleansed. We are healed.
But what of this stuff in the psalm about enemies being
ashamed?
This is important.
Even after we are healed our conscience will still accuse us. The world will call us sick and point out
where we behave sinfully. And Satan will
live up to his name. He is “the accuser
of the brethren”, and he constantly accuses us.
Yet for all that will be said to show that we are not healed, that we
are still the same broken people we were before, and that we are still in our
trespasses and sins; for all of that, there is this: Jesus died for me. I am baptized into his death. I have been fed on His body and blood for my
salvation. I will be confident in Him,
and not in myself.
Father in Heaven,
your mercy is new every morning. I know
my brokenness and my guilt brings me shame to the core of my being. Yet this is my confidence; Jesus died and
rose for me. Strengthen my faith to hold
on to this promise, and give me Your Spirit that my life may show the Life
You’ve given me. Amen.
Comments